10 Guidelines To A Happy Life

I have been thinking these past few days about my life, and I have come up with some guidelines and lessons that I have learned that may make things easier, not only for me, but for anyone who chooses to try these out. I hope you can use some of these in your life, too.

1. You HAVE to live!You can't just go through life only existing. You have to have fun, but at the same time, stick to the things you value most. Don't be afraid to enjoy life! I have two quotes that are my absolute favorite. The first one is one is by Mark Frost. It says, “Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body. But rather, to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up,totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming .... WOW what a ride.” The other is just as true as the first. Oscar Wilde wrote this next one, "To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all." Its important to live your life in such a way that you can look back after t's all over and say, "I am completely happy with the way my life turned out."

2. Ignore the people that only want to bring you down! It's not fair to you to let someone ruin your day when you could be absolutely happy. People aren't necessarily smart with their decisions, and they make mistakes. But that's what makes us human! There are billions of people in the world, and for you to let one person bring you down, well, that's just not good. Do what makes YOU happy, and forget about those with the bad intention to turn your frown upside down!

3. Take chances! Don't be afraid to stand out in the crowd. If people don't like you, who cares?! They don't have to live with you. All that matters is that you be the best you that you can be! I have this really cool friend, Karyn, who always said, "Whether you love me or you hate me, I'm still on yo mind." I'm not sure where she got it, but it rings true no matter what. Always remember that even though people may not like you, it doesn't mean you have done anything wrong. Just move on and forget them! You'll be so much happier!

4. Try new things! Go on adventures! There is so much out there to try and taste and do that there is almost a never-ending list. Go on new hikes, or try a new food. If you like it, GREAT! You have something else to add to the list of things you like. If you don't, well, at least you'll know not to do it or try it again. Just keep your values in mind, and don't try things that could harm you in anyway. Stay healthy and active. Get involved in clubs in school or  activities in your church or work place. You never know what you'll like until you give it a try!

5. Watch what you do and what you say. Everyone gets angry at one point or another, but we need to remember to not say things that we will regret. I try to watch the things I say because one day, the person I said it to won't be here and I may not have the chance to apologize for it. It's just easier to think before you speak instead of having to go back and correct a mistake like that. As for your actions, don't do anything that your 1st grade self would be ashamed of. It's easy in this society to just go with the flow and doing something that you once told yourself you would never do. Don't get caught up in that. Impress your younger self!

6.  Don't rush love! I know that there are so many people out there who don't want to be alone in life and fear being alone. Their natural response it to look for that attention and to feel that love. However, some people find love in the wrong places. Some of the things they think is love, is only a temporary happiness that will leave you feeling worse about yourself than you did before. Let REAL love find you. Don't go searching for a false happiness.

7.Don't hold grudges! It will only make you more miserable than the person that you are holding the grudge against. You just have to forgive and forget, no matter how hard that really is. On the other side, you have to be forgiving of the person with the grudge. Set the better example for other people and show them you can just brush these things off. Sooner or later, the whole incident won't even matter! You will forget all about it when you find the thing that makes you truly happy!

8. Follow your dreams! Don't let anyone tell you that you are not good enough or that you won't be able to do the things you want to do in life. Go after the things you desire! Don't limit yourself to what you know you can do, but go beyond and do those things others deemed impossible! Be the leader of your life and don't let anyone stop you from fulfilling your dreams! If they truly love you, they will support you and not hold you back.

9. Love with all your heart! Your family and friends are the most important. When you find your special someone, love them and hold them tight. Don't let go! Love them for all eternity. Never give up on them and never be afraid to show them how much you love them. Sometimes they may not know it. Fight for them with everything you have and cherish the time you have with them. Don't give them a single doubt of your love for them. Tell them you love them everyday and MEAN IT! Don't just pretend to love them because that hurts worse than leaving them. Be kind to them and let everything you do for them come from the heart. That is where the real prize is.

10. Laugh. A lot! Laughing is good for you! It is also contagious! Just be happy!

I know these things will work if you just apply them to your life. Even if you only use one guideline at a time. Just give it a shot :) It will be worth it!

Alcohol Poisoning Awareness

Shelby Allen.

Tonight i saw a presentation on something that has become a serious issue in the teenage world. It has found its way into the lives of some adults as well. The subject for tonight's blog post is Alcohol Poisoning. There is this wonderful woman by the name of Debbie Allen. She is the mother of Shelby Allen, who passed away on December 20, 2008. Shelby was a girl who simply loved life. Her motto was "Dig Life!" Her mother was so proud of her and loved her so much. Shelby had gone to a friends house for a party at approximately 12:40 am with her best friend, Alyssa, on this night. At this party, there was alcohol and parents that hadn't put a stop to this dangerous action. Shelby had a few drinks, ended up hitting her head on the toilet, and cut her lip and bruised her cheek. Her friend continued to take pictures and watch her as she lay propped up against the toilet. She was "half snoring and shaking", as her friend described. The next morning, Alyssa awoke to her friend, dead on the floor. This beautiful girl had been the victim of something that is 100% preventable. The autopsy had shown that all that was in her stomach at her time of death, was 8 oz of alcohol. (please visit her website: http://shelbysrulesfoundation.com)

However, Shelby is not the only one who has suffered from alcohol poisoning. There are many other people who have died from this fatal action. Please, if you see someone who is drinking, encourage them to stop. You just never know if you or your friend will be the unlucky one who does not wake up.

Shortly after the passing of her daughter, Debbie had come up with "Shelby's Rules". The first thing Shelby and her mother would like everyone to know, is that "Secrets Kill". Not calling 9-1-1 is basically allowing your friend to die. By keeping these things a secret, you aren't giving your friend the chance to live again. Studies have shown that 100% of the people that go into the emergency room with alcohol poisoning, and get the help they need, have come out just fine. They lived. You MUST notify someone of these things. Alcohol + Passed out(unresponsive) = 9-1-1.
Some of the symptoms of alcohol poisoning include:

• Vomiting
• Person cannot be roused
• Semi-consciousness or unconsciousness

Please do not be afraid to call. You are the difference between life and death for that person.
Also, there are some myths I would like to tell you about. Coffee is NOT a cure for a hangover. It takes time. Do NOT shower the victim. The water my be a shock to the victim and will put them in a coma and they will die. Letting them sleep it off is NOT an effective option. Again, they may slip into a coma and not wake up.

Braxton Anderson

Please educate everyone you know about this. There is nothing funny about seeing someone unconscious from the alcohol. We do not need someone to leave this earth for something like this. There is so much that I learned tonight. A lot of this was completely new to me.  I knew drinking was a problem, but I was not aware of how serious this is. Please check out The Allen's website and learn all you can about this. Who knows, maybe you can save the life of someone you know. Thank you so much for reading this. It means a lot to me. I love you all!

~This post was made in memory of Braxton Anderson, Shelby Anderson, and every other victim of alcohol poisoning. May you rest in peace.~

Be Cautious, Not Judgmental.

One night there was a woman at the airport who had to wait for several hours before catching her next flight. While she waited she bought a book and a pack of biscuits to spend the time. She looked for a place to sit and waited. She was deep into her book, when suddenly she realized that there was a young man sitting next to her who was stretching his hand, with no concern whatsoever, and grabbing the pack of cookies lying between them. He started to eat them one by one. Not wanting to make a fuss about it she decided to ignore him. The woman, slightly bothered, ate the cookies and watched the clock, while the young and shameless thief of biscuits was also finishing them. The woman started to get really angry at this point and thought ‘If I wasn’t such a good and educated person, I would have given this daring man a black eye by now.’

Every time she ate a biscuit, he had one too. The dialogue between their eyes continued and when only one biscuit was left, she wondered what was he going to do. Softly and with a nervous smile, the young man grabbed the last biscuit and broke it in two. He offered one half to the woman while he ate the other half. Briskly she took the biscuit and thought, ‘What an insolent man! How uneducated! He didn’t even thank me!’ She had never met anybody so fresh and sighed relieved to hear her flight announced. She grabbed her bags and went towards the boarding gate refusing to look back to where that insolent thief was seated. After boarding the plane and nicely seated, she looked for her book which was nearly finished by now. While looking into her bag she was totally surprised to find her pack of biscuits nearly intact. ‘If my biscuits are here’, she thought feeling terribly, ‘those others were his and he tried to share them with me.’ Too late to apologize to the young man, she realized with pain, that it was her who had been insolent, uneducated and a thief, and not him. (story borrowed from http://alqamardesigns.wordpress.com/2008/06/15/think-twice-before-judging-others/)

It's really easy for us to judge other people, especially if they don't come from the same type of living situation, or even the same class in our economy. Most of the time, people are judged by the clothing they wear and the little mistakes they make. We don't know the situations people are in, so who are we to judge them? In my opinion, we should leave the judging up to God, the one who knows every single person better than they know themselves. Get to know people. Don't immediately label them just because of what they wear. All this goes back to "Don't judge a book by it's cover." People aren't always what they seem. Besides, if you judge people, you have no time to love them. Be cautious about people (meaning look at their intentions and personalities), but under no circumstance should you be judgmental about their outward appearance. My mom always told me "I don't care if the people you see are blue, purple, orange, green, round, square, or have funny hair styles. Be nice to them, they could eventually be your best friend."

Independent!

This world we live in has become a little too comfortable with divorce. One problem with divorce, besides the fact you are no longer with the one you love, thought you loved, or were even pressured to be with, is that there are too many people that don't know how to support themselves. They aren't as independent as they thought. We typically see this with women, but men have the same problem. This also applies to any relationship in general. Sometimes we take our partner, boyfriend or girlfriend for granted and try to convince ourselves that they will never leave. The truth is, whether they leave or not, we still need to gain our independence. We can't always rely on other people. If we did that, we would get nowhere. We would have other people doing the work for us and we would have no pride in the things we do or the things we earn for ourselves. In an honest opinion, I believe that is part of how the abusive relationships start. The reason I say this, is because once the other person knows how much we depend on them, they begin to realize that they can make you do anything. Ladies, please don't let your husbands, boyfriends, or even guy friends take advantage of you like that. Stand up for yourself. Become independent and let them know that they cannot take away your freedom. Gentlemen, it is good to be attached to a woman and love her. But be sure that you can support yourself if anything does happen. It is crucial that we find ways to be independent. Especially in the place we call "home".

In closing, I would just like to share this quote by Toba Beta. "“Man will never be stronger nor independent if he lives under perpetual motivation of others.”

I hope everyone can learn to be independent because I know you have the potential to do great things. But I also caution you. If you become to independent, you may get to the point where you push your friends away. Maybe even know that you need help, but not ask for it. Please recognize those times and accept the help that is being offered. It's not a bad thing to ask for help as long as you are willing to accept it.

You Are Not Alone

If you look around the world, you may notice that a lot of people are becoming more and more depressed. Some of this depression is triggered by financial problems, relationship problems, abuse, and some are simply because they don't feel that they fit in. The people that suffer from depression, often try and find a release for that stress. Unfortunately, some of these "solutions" are very dangerous. Cutting and suicide are some of the more serious ones. And, although solitude seems great, it does the same amount of harm. People who have depression may think that they are alone, and that the only thing left to do is harm themselves. This is not true, though. It is important for those with this mindset to realize that there are better, more effective solutions to getting rid of your depression. Let them know they can turn to you and let them know you will be waiting, arms wide open, and ready to help. Reassurance is a priceless gift to someone who needs your comfort.

"Many of us spend our whole lives running from feeling with the mistaken belief that you cannot bear the pain. But you have already borne the pain. What you have not done is feel all you are beyond that pain."

This is a quote by Kahlil Gibran that I found very inspirational. All we need to do, is give hope to those who have even the slightest hint of depression. It is always important to be there for them. To help them realize that they have so much to live for, and by doing the things that they could be doing to harm themselves, it is not making their situation any better. They need to know that they are so much more than they give themselves credit for. We can never leave those people alone because if we do, things may go to far, and our help is no longer effective. Show them the love that they need.


*This post goes out to a good friend of mine, Lilly. I love you :D*

When Drinks Consume You

During my long and full 17 years, 51 weeks, and 6 days of life, I have seen many situations where people have had a strong addiction to alcohol. Not only is it not healthy, but it is also sad. Many people who are addicted to alcohol often cannot see that it is harmful to them, until it's too late. Plus, it not only affects the person, but it affects the people they know, people around them, and people that they don't even know. What they don't know, is that while they are drinking, life is slipping by them. They are so obsessed with their alcohol and feel that they need it so badly, that they forget what is really important. They waste their money for a temporary "happiness, when they could be saving to get a better job, or to support their family.

"If you need an excuse for why you don't drink alcohol, you could say that addiction runs in your family and you don't want to try it even once because you may not stop until you are dead in a puddle of your own vomit or smashed into the side of a mini-van with children's body parts scattered around your corpse."

~Duane Alan Hahn

Although this seems grotesque and hard to think about, these are real live situations that happen to thousands of people every day. This is the cold hard truth. The Japanese Proverbs states, "First the man takes a drink; then the drink takes a drink; then the drink takes the man." I believe this to be true because a lot of the time, it only takes one. One sluff. One cigarette. One drink. That's all it takes for everything to change in the blink of an eye.

Fun without challenge, without inner satisfaction, often comes from surrogate motivators influencing one's actions and perceptions. More often than not, something like this is considered "fun" because it is a lack of "pain", be it social, physical, or psychological pain. For example, if you are programmed with social expectations that drinking and partying are key steps in securing one's self-worth, and that not having a bar life makes one lame and unaccepted, then one can squander away much of life in a drunken stupor, blissfully thinking all is fun with this programmed lifestyle.

~Montalk

P.S. I love you, Uncle Jason. Please think about life and how you can better yourself. And always remember, I love you and so do a lot of people.

Live Life To The Fullest

When making certain decisions, people often refer to the saying, "you only live once..." What they do not look at is the last part: "...but if you do it right, once is enough." (Quote by Mae West) Throughout my years in school, I have heard this quote spoken when people are talking about whether or not to have sex or do some other crazy thing. In order to live a full life, you have to do the things that you won't feel guilty admitting to someone you look up to or someone you are trying to impress. It' good to do crazy things, but not things you can possibly get in trouble for doing. If you live your life to the fullest, you should have no regrets. You should be happy with how your life went, and not just satisfied that it wasn't horrible. I recently found a quote by Oscar Wilde that says, "To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all."  I believe this to be true because you can either do what you have to to get by, or you can take the high road and make it worth your while. You have to live life to some extent anyway, so why not make it amazing in the process?

Albert Einstein once said, "There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle." This quote is similar to the one about looking at the glass as half full, instead of half empty. Be positive because it makes life more fun and exciting. Plus, it is easier to be happy when you are positive instead of down and pessimistic. Try to not take things for granted. Be grateful for what you have.

Many people associate wealth with money, and not with life. Living life to the fullest is a great way to show you're wealthy. Life is not always about being a millionaire or becoming the next top model. It is about doing what makes you happy and being all that you want to be. That is what will make you the richest person in the world, even if you only have one penny to your name.

You Are You For A Reason

In nature, when an animal is skinny and frail, we see it as sick.It doesn't seem to have the muscle and strength that it needs to survive in this dog-eat-dog world. If this is true, then why does the majority of the human population believe that it is attractive? Why is it any different from the animals' situation? The problem is, the world has created an image of the perfect person: skinny, luscious hair, clear skin, perfect nose and eyes. Not everyone can look like this. Each person is the way they are for a reason. If we all looked like that girl on the front of the Cover Girl, or the guy in the Rolling Stones magazine, we would all look the same. There would be no way to tell us apart from one another. When some people make themselves as skinny as those models, they become sick and frail. Only when it becomes serious do we realize that it is not good for us. Yes, it is good to be fit and in shape, but it's not good to obsess over something as dumb as weight. Ladies, you are meant to have a body that is durable enough to give birth to a child. It is not there for you to change it dramatically. It is actually healthy to allow yourself to have a little body fat, believe it or not. You have a purpose in life. Your body will help you with the things you need to get done. Take care of your body and don't abuse it.

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive, well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "WOO HOO, What a ride!!"

This is a quote i found in a magazine once. This is the way we should live life. We shouldn't be worrying about weight or whether or not we look like a model. Enjoy your life and only please yourself with your appearance. You and your happiness are way more important than the opinion of those who are uneducated in true beauty.

"Do you want a REAL Woman or an EMPTY Shell? Beauty only goes so deep when that is gone what is left?!" ~Susan

*Note: This post had some input from Susan Wright. Thank you! And thanks for the pic;)*

Cheater, Cheater

"You said you loved her. Was it just an act? Are you just too afraid to face the facts? She was perfect, too perfect for you, and you decided you needed someone new. You knew what you were doing all along. How could you be satisfied with something so wrong? She loved you and you threw her to the ground. Do you even know how stupid you sound when you tell those lies and not feel bad? You really don't know what you had. She's gone now and she's not coming back. You better hope this makes up for the things she lacks. She's moved on and you're left behind to live with the guilt for the rest of your life." ~Me

I know a lot of people who have been cheated on. It's nothing fun to deal with. The person that was cheated on usually ends up thinking, "what did I do wrong?" The important thing to know is that if you are a victim of this heart-breaking action, it is not your fault. You didn't do anything wrong. They just do not know that what they have to begin with is something special. There should be no reason to cheat. If you don't like the person like you thought, break it off. It hurts worse when someone cheats on you than it does to break it off before it starts. Take into consideration that people are sensitive and want to be loved and accepted. It's hard to feel that love and acceptance when the other person doesn't think you are worth their time.

Grandpa Duane Burge

"I looked at you- my eyes soft and full of care. I saw your body but your spirit was not there. It was roaming around, happy and care free. I know you were finally happy because I could feel you around me. You lived a great life and it was time to let go so you could be with the ones you did so carefully know. I will always remember you and the good times we had, the way you made me smile, and how you never seemed sad. It brings tears to my eyes because you aren't physically here, but I know you are home now. Ill hold your mem'ries near." - Me

This poem goes out to my Grandfather, Duane Burge, who passed away on July 3, 2011 at 2:00 am.

As i watched my grandfather lay in bed, I realized that this was no life to live. He would not be able to be the way he was if he were to get better because he had so many complications with his heart and his health in general. A few family members had said that they think his spirit left his body at some point when his body was shutting down. One thing that made it a little easier when i heard that, was knowing he wasn't in pain. His spirit wasn't obligated to stay and suffer through the pain that could have been present as his body tried healing itself. There was no need to remain in a situation like that.
My grandfather was truly a great man. From his leather working skills, to having the drive it took to obtain more knowledge about his favorite hobbies and dreams, to watching his grandchildren grow up, he certainly had the patience it took to do all these things. He had the motivation to teach his children and grandchildren the right way to live. He showed everyone that he could be there for them when in time of need. He was not hesitant to buy anything for his family if they could not afford it. He was the type of person that you could count on and know that he will take care of it. He had the best sense of humor and he knew how to be sarcastic, as most of the family is. He also knew how to be serious and still have that caring side to him. He was the first to jump with someone was in trouble. He had a brother and sisters who adored him. His crazy stories about his life made you eager to hear more. He would make dinosaur shaped pancakes for the kids who chose to stay the night. And best of all, my Grandpa Burge was the perfect match to my Grandma Cheryl. They completed each other. They were the perfect couple.

After staying by his side through his last moments, I knew that my life was blessed to have even known him. He made a great impact on many people. He is someone I can definitely look up to. It is astounding to know that life can change in the blink of an eye. Even though we do not want to think the worst when something happens, it is best to know that what is happening was supposed to happen. Some people call it fate, and others call it God's will. Which ever you prefer, just know that things will work out. Although it is hard to let go of a loved one, it's something everyone has to do at one point. However, we do not have to do this alone. We always have family, friends, neighbors, and most importantly, Heavenly Father. We are never alone no matter what. He will help us to let go of them because we will see them in heaven. Life on earth is but a short moment when compared to all eternity we get to spend with our loved ones in heaven.

**As I close this blog, I just wanted to say, I love you and miss you Grandpa! Everyone does! <3**